Comparison Culture: Why Everyone Else’s Holiday Looks Better

Hello! Welcome to another edition of ABC of Mental Health, your companion on your journey to mental health. 

We’ve all been there – scrolling through endless pictures of perfect vacations, flawless smiles, and sunsets that seem more golden than ours. In those moments, it’s easy to feel like our own life is somehow lacking. This week, we explore the quiet ache of comparison, why it shows up so strongly around holidays, and how it disconnects us from our own joy? This week, we unpack why everyone else’s holiday looks better—and how to stop the scroll from stealing your joy.

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One relevant recommendation:

Practical 3 step guide on how to take a social media break (without FOMO):

Step 1: Pick your window
Choose a small, manageable break—start with 12 or 24 hours. Let friends know you’re logging off if that helps reduce pressure.

Step 2: Replace the scroll
Have a go-to plan: journaling, a low-stakes hobby, rewatching your comfort show, or meeting someone in person. Keep your hands busy and your heart full.

Step 3: Reflect, don’t rush back
After your break, ask yourself: Did I feel calmer? Less comparison-y? What did I not miss? Let that insight guide your future scroll habits.

Even a mini digital detox can remind you: the world beyond the screen is quieter—and kinder. 

Two Quotes on Comparison Culture:

Bollywood star Deepika Padukone, advocating for mental well-being and authenticity, reminds us:

“You have to be okay with yourself before being okay with others. Stop comparing your life to someone else's. Everyone has their own struggles—what you see is not the full story.”

Actor-singer Ayushmann Khurrana, known for embracing individuality, once said:

“Don’t measure your success with someone else’s ruler. Everyone has a different clock—run your own race.”

Three TherapyShorts from TST

1. The Highlight Reel Isn’t the Whole Movie

   No one’s posting the missed flights, the sunburns, or the arguments over Google Maps. We see the best 3 seconds of someone’s week and compare it to our entire day. The social media posts our screens are inundated with are actually not realistic and effortless, rather they hide the hours of planning and trials and errors it takes to capture those perfect shots with the most flattering angles bathed in the most suitable lights. Those moments are highly curated and designed to portray a specific idea, kind of like a commercial. If you get swept away in that and feel left out, it doesn’t make you ungrateful or bitter—it makes you human.
   

2. Envy Is Just a Clue—Not a Character Flaw

   Feeling jealous? Instead of judging yourself, get curious. Maybe you’re craving rest, excitement, or connection. What would your version of joy look like right now? (Spoiler: it doesn’t have to involve airports or aesthetic cafés.) Spend time trying out different things if you’re not exactly sure what it is that you’re looking for. It may not end up being the most popular thing out there but you will know if something feels right for you. Lean into that feeling and you might discover something wonderful about yourself that may be unique to you.
   

3. You Don’t Have to “Earn” Rest

   You don’t need a travel itinerary to justify taking a break. Rest can look like a solo coffee date, a phone-free Sunday, or sleeping in without guilt. The pressure to be “productive” even while resting is real and may work well for some who benefit from engaging in relaxing activities—but rest may be more passive as well, in slowing down, unplugging, and just being, allowing your body to rest and recover. Understand the kind of rest you need to fulfill your physical, emotional and mental resting needs.

A QUICK QUESTION…

When you scroll through holiday posts, what hits you hardest? Vote here!

Last week, we asked if you what felt like the smallest act of freedom for you, and the responses were… (drumroll please)…

Wishing you a grounded, peaceful scroll and a reminder: Your worth isn’t up for comparison.

With care and compassion,

The Social Therapist

P.S. Self care, not procrastination!